Sex, Sexual Challenge, and Culture

Written by
Dana

Sex, Sexual Challenge, and Culture

Un article de
Dana

Note: This article was based on a dream I had many moons ago, in which I dreamt of the above title. May it be a gift!

There are many Creation Myths from many cultures.

Some say that all of Creation was born from the tension and interplay of masculine and feminine principles; perhaps the Big Bang was even the Cosmic Orgasm! We are a living microcosm of the Creation Myth, as we each are created incarnate from the seed of our father and the womb-egg of our mother.

Polarity is a creative force. Through time, the Dance of Polarity has shaped our evolution, culture, religion, society, and perceptions of reality. It has shaped who we believe we are.

Mythologies of what it means to be man/woman, masculine/feminine, what it means to relate from these identities, we carry through generations, deep in our bones.

Perhaps much of the myths are strata lain on a ground of Truth - for part of the beauty of existence is the difference, the potential of polarity making contact. Yet also apparent in the world around us is the way these stories can create fragmented expectations of what we should be, of who we are. Cultural definitions of our identity based on the genitalia we arrive with, can create a tension within us if our inner experience doesn't match.

With the growing strength of the LGBTIQ+ community and other questioning seekers, we are in a time of re-discovering the creative force of polarity within ourselves and within each other. The paradox of polarity is that it is fluid, a dance of tension and union. A dance of one becoming the other, the other becoming the one. A dance of the both. And this dance has infinite possibilities of expression. So how can we re-tell, re-weave, and re-work the stories that have been told to us, to make space for this creative potential?

On my 30th birthday, I began re-writing my own story.

I had been praying intensely for a year about the divine union of feminine and masculine, feeling the potential of some evolutionary heterosexual relationship with a man. The answer I was gifted came in unexpected form – a full-grown mustache. Perhaps that brings a smile to your own mustached or un-mustached mouth...Yes, it may sound silly, especially given that there are plenty of feminine women (and men) who rock facial hair - yet I was faced with the unexpected shattering of my identity. I remember clearly an image of myself during my birthday ceremony, dressed in white, emerging from a cave. I simply crumpled to the earth, covered in dirt and terror and tears. Later, there was also the joyous memory of driving down the highway, New Mexican red rocks in the distance, and feeling so completely free. I could only join in laughing at the ludicrous play of the Universe. Then there was the Gay Pride party where I painted on my mustache even darker and received a lap dance from a beautiful drag queen.  Sometimes I was an exile. Sometimes I was seer. Sometimes I was a trickster. Sometimes I didn't know who I was at all.

I came face to face with my androgynous self – the relationship of masculine and feminine within. I questioned my femininity. My beauty. My sexuality. And paradoxically, I was simultaneously discovering what it meant for me to be a woman.

For 27 moons, I lived in the shattering pain, rejoicing freedom, and ridiculous hilarity of exploring the mustached edges of who I believed I was. I met many others along the way who were also questioning their gender, their sexuality, the way they had been told they must show up in the world. Men, women, they - people of great courage and beauty. Together, we were discovering a more authentic self, with all the pain and illumination and laughter that can hold. We were playing with the polarity within. I discovered that one form of play can be in asking questions:

What is the Truth of who we are?

What gifts are revealed when we meet ourselves with the courage of authenticity? While culture can play a valuable role in our self-expression and collective cohesion, what happens when we explore an authenticity that reaches beyond our cultural conditioning? What would it feel like, look like, taste like, smell like, sound like - to make more authentic contact with each other – to allow ourselves to be seen - in our sexuality and beyond?

I have since let the mustache go, though the journey of self-discovery continues. Meeting the truth of who we are is one of the great discoveries of Life. Meeting each other in that truth brings that discovery to Life. Relationship is the Dance of Polarity in motion, the living Creation Myth of each moment.

As we peel away the layers of who we have been told we were, of who we have believed we were, we access immense creative power, both individually and together. We question, we listen, we see. We create from this expanding awareness.

From the Big Bang to modern times, our creative power, including our sexual power, has been a force of our evolution. Our challenge now is to consciously wield this power, to come together and to co-create something new from the fullness of who we are. May we joyfully meet that challenge, individually and in our relationships. May we Question! Connect! Evolve! And may you BE – radically, authentically – YOU.

I currently work in the Bern area offering sessions and workshops on connecting more deeply with body, with each other and with the Earth. Learn more information through my website and feel free to contact me.

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